My life as a pillion

Yes. I am a pillion. One can find me at the back seat of the bike because Im not aware how to ride the monster. They say you need to handle it properly and it will take care of you. But till date I have not been able to interpret what they try to mean by 'properly'. If it is loosely, yes Ive tried that and met with accidents. If it is with style, yes Ive done that too(only while taking a pic). But why is it so that I am one of the very few people of my age who is yet to know what properly is like?
That could be because I haven't tried , or maybe because I didnt get the opportunity at the exact moment. As a kid, whenever I saw the advertisement 'Buland Bharat ki Buland Tasvir" I used to think that it as a big joke. A marketing gimmick (I didnt know the word gimmick then, I used to think in my native language and with all the new words that MBA has helped me to add to my dictionary, I guess gimmick suit the purpose). How is it possible that every other person in the country possesses a ride. So again, as a kid I never sat on a parked bike trying to make it fly. I didn't even get nearer to a scooter except in a traffic signal. Whenever I was required to go anywhere,  it was either the public transports of a hired cab.
As I grew up, none of my friends also possessed a bike and I never thought that there was anything weird in it. Or in other words, a motorbike have had always been a distant, alien, mechanical monster for me. But things change and it took a drastic turn when I came to Goa Institute of Management with the purpose of completing my post graduation. And here I belong to the minority of the people who doesn't know how to behave with the monster 'properly'. But I made friends and they always help me to go places. And that is when my life started as a pillion.
Now, it is in my nature, that whatever I do I do it really well. Be it some professional task, or be it personal. And so I soon turned out to be the best pillion ever (In case you are not a sexist).
I sit at the back of the rider. I carry his bags. I dont mind when he does not slow near a bumper (even if it hurts my arse a lot). I dont talk much (Obviously I dont want to distract the rider). And of course I am loyal (you give me a ride once, Ill always come back to you whenever I require something).
So I am proud to be a pillion, I love being one, and Ill continue to be a pillion till the time I properly interpret the word 'proper'

War of the Witties

Its been some 2 months as a PGP2 at Goa Institute of Management, and as it seems that I am the only dumb person in the entire campus. Ill rather stay locked in my room or listen to some stupid song than going to the canteen and meddle with people. Such a waste! A degree in Management helps one learn how to waste idle time as yet project that you are damn busy. And it is apparent from the numerous weird groups that has been set up in facebook that recently there has been an outburst in the Management students all across the country. Well, when Mark Zuckerberg came up with the noble idea of groups in the social networking site, I wonder what he had in his mind. Social groups historically was an attribute of the high or low strata of the society. Sophisticated, well groomed people generally used to clutter together and apparently used to laugh at each others' stupid jokes in the high society groups. While poor people in rugged clothes and a toothpick between their teeth used to plot some revenge against their oppressor in the other extreme. There used to be a certain set of criteria to be a part of any group. To be among the royals, one was required to project an image of success , and to be among the ruggeds all one was supposed to do was curse and lose temper. So historically the middle class people were always deprived of the experience of being in a typical social group. In such a scenario, zuckerberg gave everybody an opportunity. And the best thing about this new concept is that one need not have any marking feature. Some stupid moderator or user of one group randomly adds you and you are supposed to leave the group if you dont like it. The irony, one could make you join some group with a single click, but when you plan to leave it you always would get a warning like 'Are you sure you want to leave the group 'MAIN CHUTIYA HOON'?' Obviously you damn program ! So coming back to our topic, i.e the management program a GIM, somehow a stupid person like me who prefers to sleep and smoke the entire day feels jealous of all the witty people out there. How can it be that they get to come up with such amazing ideas whenever someone loses a key or a RFID.

Oh my gawd !! You are so funny man. And you are apparently so smart that you described what a RFID is! Give me a break, on our campus, it is alright to forget your pants but not your RFID. So that effort you took up was not necessary. And a treat , an absolute necessity when you draft a mail like this. Dont overlook the subject line. Awwww F*** ! You just made my heart skip a beat.
But its been an year and we are used to these things. A light tap on the delete button at one corner of my laptop generally helps to overcome when I face these mails. So we planned to come up with something new. It is relevant to mention over here that the theme of our business fest this year has been 'Innovation'. And I should have known that this thing was coming.Whenever anyone plans to go to panjim and the news is made public, all one gets to hear is a list of orders from KFC and Dominos. Though nobody really means it, but putting up a comment is facebook seems necessary. Even if the person leaving for panjim is your next door neighbor, still the preferred channel of communication seems to be Facebook ! Weird !

Neway, I dont complain. And maybe because I am not that fond of pizza/KFC, or maybe because I am too aged to find the humor in these mails and posts, they dont really appeal to me. But seriously man, you are so funny. Ha ha ha ! Im panting for breath. And I guess this post will help you get laid tonight. Ohkay , Ill grab a coffee !